I Found Myself (#poem)

I found myself tonight
When I saw you there
Hiding in plain sight
Navy blue on a hanger

Like memories put on a shelf
The pants I wore held you dear
Lying in my arms your love I felt
You were always a part of me

I found you tonight
Wrapped in a simple fabric
The clock chimed back in time
The scent of yesterday’s remembrance

In the Still of the Night (#poem)

In the still of the night I walk and I pray
My mind seeks your voice and your company
Searching for miracles in the light of day
Maybe not A-S-A-P but as long as it takes

These lessons I’ve learned through the tears and the struggle
I couldn’t have known coukd be so invaluable
Through promises you led tucked away in my heart
Your will be done was just the start

As writing and music are the prayers of an artist
It’s not the end result but all about the process
The heart has reason that reason can’t know
And God has logic the world does not bestow

In the still of the night I walk and I pray
As long as I am writing, I feel okay
But if I stop what happens to me?
Will I be able to practice what I profess to believe?

I Lost You (#poem)

I lost you before I was born
Those in charge I could not warn
Maybe that’s why my heart is so afraid
In the womb I had no say
Helpless as I was being made

She gave me life, then she took it away
Broken and wounded and so afraid
Finding something from another man
While you served in a war like Viet Nam
How else could she have made the choices she made?

You never stopped loving her in spite of it all
When a father loves the mother even after a great fall
Is the greatest gift a daughter can see
Feeling the love and the power to believe
Knowing if only she’d trusted what she’d had

It’s whisky under the bridge having gone separate ways
Sons and daughters and grandkids to my dismay
Squeezing me out as if I did not exist
Twisting me into an identity, not for me but against
Refusing to acknowledge who I really am

Forgiveness is healing, no need to carry that burden
But one needs to be sorry, of this I am certain
Without it there is no great story of repentance
That’s the difference between Peter and Judas
I lost you before I was born

I Went Home Today (#poem)

I went home today
He was there but I could not stay
I heard the promise given last July
Future victory conquers a lifetime lie

I must hold on
His presence lingers after I’m gone
The photos are proof but even better
Written on my heart are the red letters

I’m going home for good
Refusing to leave if I could
The stakes are high, the mountains tall
Untul my last breath, I’m giving it my all

I Close My Eyes (#poem)

I close my eyes and I see the light
Shining into my soul
Who are you this long and lonely night
Lighting my flame with a burning coal

I will not collapse I answer back
I’ve trusted far too long
The road is winding but nothing I lack
Leaning into a shepherd’s arms so strong

Pondering the moments you touched my face
Thumbing through photos in my mind
Reviewing the scenes through eyes of faith
I see your love caressing my life as our story unwinds

I close my eyes and I see the light
Guiding my soul through dark and lonely nights

Moments of Surrender (#poem)

Moments of surrender are the sweetest sound
Love sings softly in a cloud of surround
Kitty calls feeling lost, hears my voice halfway up the stairs
Troubles bubble like champagne completely unaware

Abundant blessings bounce before me on a trampoline
Memories sweet as a summer night on a front porch swing
When those before me say good-bye with a final ticket to ride
Life is shaken sending ripples where kitties once slept by my side

Sleepless thoughts are the norm these long and lonely nights
Abandoned only in my mind, surrender conquers the fright
Morning brings one step forward, nighttime falls with two steps backward
Up and down, down and up, confidence shaken and fractured

Victories, he said, are as sweet as cognac
Laugh, my child, or you’re bound to crack
He lived what he preached for 95 years
Bring on the voices of the chanticleers

The Dawn is Breaking (#poem)

After a long dark night of the soul
I feel the morning skies brighten
No pink streaks of light on the horizon
Just a peaceful feeling lifting me out of the hole

Like traffic quickening in the commute hours
The pulse is palpable this morning
Letting go was a blessing and warning
Preparing me for a new season of flowers

The dawn is breaking without my prodding
Surrender was the final push
Like spring rain caressing the rose bush
My soul awakens anew with longing

Leap of Faith (#poem)

What do you do when you don’t know what to do?
When conflicting demands pull you in different directions, too
When the consequences of your choices put you in a jam
One step at a time, you do the best that you can

It didn’t go the way you imagined when you took that leap of Faith
How could you know this time would be different when the other times everything fell into place
Don’t give up when it’s not over yet
Some day you will see that it’s simply perfect

Each mountain gets taller, the pathway gets longer
The wise men disappear, making you stronger
So that you can lend a helping hand to someone down the rung
Man or woman, old or young

This is how Saints are made, it may surprise you to think about
Under pressure you kick and stomp and shout
More like Peter, not John or Mary
What could be more contrary?

You relive it, rehash it, go back to the beginning, wracking your brain
Questioning what could have, should have changed
Not knowing how this story will end
Would you take that Leap of Faith again?

I Freakin’ Love Music Production

So I started my Silicon Valley career in book production working for San Francisco publishers and printers before I segued to high tech companies in San Jose. Unfortunately, production departments were eventually incorporated into technical writing so I was forced to do both. But I’ve always had a thing for production. And now it’s music production.

You know how you can’t seem to avoid people on Facebook who follow some site called “I freakin’ love science” (to put it nicely). Well, I freakin’ love music production. I can’t resist watching videos of music producers working in their studios. Oh, yeah, Loopcloud isn’t bad either.

Check out this video about the latest version of Loopcloud.