You may have read my article, “Relationships with Fathers Influence Relationships with Men.” Or perhaps you have read my book Myths of the Fatherless where I dispel the myths about being fatherless that society often accepts as fact. But since I wrote this article and book, I’ve heard from several men and women about how being fatherless is impacting their marriage, their sexuality, and their ability to trust God.
Because the experience you’ve had with a father figure or lack of father figure sets the stage for your experiences with all male figures, including your Heavenly Father. Often people will tell you that your Heavenly Father is the “father to the fatherless,” hoping to bring you comfort. And that is true. But, first, you may have to work through some issues in order to feel the comfort that a relationship with our Heavenly Father can bring.
How do you do that? Whether you’re a committed Christian or not, the first thing to do is to pray to our Heavenly Father. Perhaps you don’t know how to pray. I’ve learned that simple can be the most powerful. Sometimes just saying or writing the word “Help” or “Help me God” will create a powerful connection to our Heavenly Father. After that, just speak from your heart, tell your story, and share your hurts with God. It’ll probably be an immense relief, getting it out of yourself and onto someone else. Telling our stories is very powerful and who better to tell our story to than a loving, all-powerful Father?
As humans, we were created to tell our stories. Generation after generation of telling our stories led to the creation of books. We live in a powerful era of being able to tell our stories and connecting with other people through the internet-either by joining a group or creating a personal blog.
Author, spiritual leader, and life coach Iyanla Vanzant from the television show, “Starting Over,” says to “Tell your story and heal yourself. Tell your story and heal somebody else.” If anybody knows, she does. She’s lived through it all.
I followed that advice and told my story. It’s been enormously powerful in leading me to healing myself, to healing others, and to healing my relationship with my earthly father and my Heavenly Father. I hope to help others tell their story, too. The method I choose to use is through my writing: articles, blogs, books and especially through fiction. I hope that you will find it helpful on your own journey to healing.